this is a debbie downer post.....if you don't want to hear it, turn back now.

it seems last nights sadness has rolled on over into today. :(
i am no happier today than i was last night.

and then this

which is speaking to so many others
is just pissing me off
i don't want to have the life that is waiting for me
i want the life that i had planned
the life that included all my babies
but right now, especially, the life that included my wyatt

i asked my counselor the other day "how many times can a heart be broken before it is beyond repair"?
i think i may be beyond repair

my body just aches at the sadness and brokenness of it all
i physically hurt almost all the time 
when will at least that part of it go away?

debbie downer
       aka
      paula

dear wyatt, i just miss you so much. there is just no other words. i love you and i can't wait until i get to see you again.
xoxoxo & a family sandwich,
mommy