"I talk to God but the sky is empty." ~ Sylvia Plath

this is how i feel. alone and abandoned. like god isn't there. and why do babies have to die? and sometimes i wonder if i am in some way a big joke to god? why does he even let me get pregnant if the baby is going to die? i mean 5 times without even trying, really??? but to go right along with that, 5 dead babies!! this has got to be a really bad joke. whatever, i am in a bit of a dark place right now. i am sure i will be better soon.

"She wasn't bitter. She was sad, though. But it was a hopeful kind of sad. The kind of sad that just takes time. "
— Stephen Chbosky (The Perks of Being a Wallflower)

well, maybe right now i am a little bitter. but hopeful, too. haven't lost that (hope) just yet. and i guess all of this will  just take time.

paula