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Tuesday, March 29, 2011

i wonder....

We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey.
-Kenji Miyazawa

i found this quote and it made me wonder.........
i must need a lot of fuel. and this journey must be quite the undertaking. because good lord, the pain in my heart does not cease and i wonder if it ever will.

my babes got their report cards yesterday. we had straight A's and A/B honor roll, woohoo!!! momma was so proud.
but.......
that got me wondering.....
i wonder if they have report cards in heaven.....
i wonder how my 16yr. old (mary), my 12yr. old (kendall) , my 6yr. old (chandler) are doing.....i hope they are making mommy proud. and on the same note....
i wonder if there is preschool...
i wonder if my 5yr. old (ethan) is being naughty or just mischievous or if he is a good boy, like his brother is.
i wonder if they have nurseries......
is wyatt getting all the love and attention that (i think) he needs....

i wonder if in heaven if everyone still has their own personalities.....
what would the personalities of all my children be....
i know wyatt already had a few strong personality traits in his short time here and he made them known. :)
i wonder about everyone else.
i think i remember ethan from his ultrasounds and he was pretty playful and rambunctious.
but i was just wondering...........

who knows....

it is funny......
all of a sudden i am wondering if i am spelling "wondering" right. and if i am, isn't it a neat little word.

the wonder of it all......
my babes near and faraway.....
the faraway.....

i wonder....

paula

to all my babes,
mommy misses you all sooooo much. i hope you all know just how much i love you. i hope you have everything you would ever need. and i hope you don't know the want that i have for you. that is something i hope you never have to know. until we are together again....it's family sandwich time. i love and miss you.
xoxo,
mommy

3 comments:

  1. Congrats to your kids on their excellent grades! I wonder about heaven a lot, too. Sometimes I wish I could just get a glimpse...

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  2. I think about the same things... and often wonder how Gabrielle is doing in heaven and how she will grow up. My heart is with you xoxo

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  3. i definitely think we have our own personalities in heaven!

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