why??

why??why do people seem to take a breath when i mention your name? why does it seem to make them so uncomfortable? why does it seem that they don't want me to talk about you?? all i want to do is talk about you. i want people to know you. to love you like i do. to want to talk about you too. ecspecially the people who knew you too. why don't they want to talk about you. why do they stare off into space when i mention your name? i just don't get it. i just don't know why?


i do have to say, your brother and sister they talk about you with me all the time. they never hesitate. they never try to change the subject. but you know what i think it is because they loved you as much as i did. they were so excited you were coming. they couldn't wait for you to get here. k was even willing to share her b-day with you, and btw she shares nothing!! we thought you two sharing b-day's waa a sign. we were already planning your parties for next year at cc. i wonder how we will celebrate now...how do we celebrate when your not going to be here?? why should we celebrate if your not going to be here?


why????????


mommy